The Mean Boy at Toddler Time

I took Bean to our local library’s toddler time for the first time about two and a half weeks ago.  They hold it at 9:30am, so we didn’t get there until 9:45 since he only woke up at 9:15.  But I was determined to get him there that morning since I actually got up and showered before him for a change!  And he LOVES being around other kids and getting out and about, so I’m really trying to find more activities we can do, especially that are free or at least cheap.

We missed the first story, but got there just in time for a song, which the leader handed out “shaker eggs” for (maracas without handles), and Bean, of course, thought that was the greatest thing ever!  The leader was collecting the eggs, and Bean was being so good by going to put his away...until another boy grabbed it out of his hands and put it away himself.  At this point, I’m not sure if that’s the same “mean boy” that this post is really about, but, gee thanks kid.  My son was learning a lesson in helping and actually giving up something in his possession (something we struggle with now that we’ve hit toddlerhood).  She then read another story, which we struggled with…he didn’t want to sit still for the entire thing, but I couldn’t let him run around either.  After all the stories and a song, it’s craft time!  Sometimes he likes to at least color, other times he’d rather just get to playing with the toys they have there.  And enter the “mean boy”…

There’s an older boy, actually I think beyond the age group for this particular toddler time, who was there that day.  I could not believe some of his behavior.  He was there with his younger sister and grandmother, and the grandmother did nothing to try to correct his unacceptable behavior (in my opinion).  I’d say the boy doesn’t know how to share, even though he has a sibling, but he does apparently.  However, he seems to have “selective” sharing abilities.  He and another boy were playing with a HUGE bag of Mega Blocks.  Bean loves his legos!  So of course he sees the bag of legos and goes to retrieve one.  He did not take it out of one of the boys hands.  He did not even take it from the structure they were building.  He took one from the pile not currently being touched or used.  I saw nothing wrong with that.  I was even hoping the boys would let him join in their fun.  But no…  As soon as that kid saw Bean holding the lego, he grabbed it and ripped it out of Bean’s hands so hard that I was afraid he would hurt him!  Bean did not seem too phased by that (thankfully), but I wanted to cry for him!  It broke my heart to see someone be so mean to him…   I slowly led Bean away and said “I’m sorry baby, you’re apparently not allowed to play with them”, hoping the grandmother would hear me and reprimand that boy or at least tell him he needs to share with all the kids, since those blocks were not his own personal ones.  But no.  I tried to keep Bean away from the blocks as much as possible, but when the grandmother began to put them away and BEAN (not her grandson!) actually helped her, I thought he would finally get his chance at those blocks and that they would be out of there a lot quicker than they were.  But no.  The boys continued playing, the grandmother continued ignoring them, and the legos were still there.  So, when I saw Bean go to retrieve a car lego that was sitting away from the boys, unattended, unused, I let him take it (because my boy LOVES his cars – first word by the way!).  The mean boy went to take it from Bean, but I stepped in (since Grandma couldn’t be bothered to).  He reached for it and said they needed ALL the legos because they were building something huge (which they hadn’t gotten very far with, and Grandma was already trying to get the kids out of there), but since I was now holding it, he did not grab it out of my hands.  It took all I had to remain calm.  But I did.  And I said to the other boy, “But can we please share?”.  He began to protest, claiming they needed every single lego in existence, and again, I just said, “Can we please share?”.  At that point the mean boy backed down and then was out of the library a few minutes later (HUGE structure not even halfway completed, I might add).  But really?  I don’t feel I should be the one who has to teach other people’s children a lesson in sharing.  However, I did tried to that day.  At first I felt completely helpless for Bean.  I never encountered a situation like that before, and I had absolutely no idea how to approach it.  After seeing that the grandmother was doing nothing about it, I felt it was my turn to step in and stand up for my son.  Yes, I realize that one day I won’t be there to defend him.  I realize that he will have to look out for himself at times.  But at only 20 months old, I needed to do something.  Did I do the right thing?  Should I have done something differently?  It felt like the right thing.  And I really don’t know what I would have done differently. 

We went back to toddler time the next week, and I was kind of dreading “the mean boy”.  What would happen this week?  How would I react?  How would Bean react?  We lucked out.  The mean boy wasn’t there.  We missed toddler time this week, because someone was a sleepy head (thanks daylight savings for screwing up our wake up time…), but I will continue to take him back every week we possibly can go.  Especially because we did meet a very shy, nice little boy, a year older than Bean, who played with him the second week.  And the boy’s mom is nice and easy to talk with as well. 

Have you ever encountered a situation like this?  How did your child react?  How did you react? 

A scary day…

 

Hello again!  I know I said I wanted to post more, and that really hasn’t happened.  I’m not going to apologize.  I’m trying really hard to find a balance between life, my Scentsy business, blogging, cleaning, relaxing….EVERYTHING!  I finally bought a planner to try to organize my tasks for everything and make myself make time for each thing.  I’m slowly working on it…

I saw From Mrs. to Mama’s post today, and thought this would be a great opportunity to get a post in.  So, here it goes…what’s been on my mind lately.

This past Friday was a somewhat scary day.  Forgive the crudeness here, but I have been having irritation in my one armpit (that’s the crudeness…no other way to best describe that area though) off an on for about a month now.  I couldn’t see anything there, so I was just attributing it to skin irritation from shaving.  I had to buy a new brand/kind of razor around when this all started, so I thought maybe I just nicked myself, or was having sensitive skin issues from this new razor.  Well, on Thursday, it started to feel the worst it’s felt since it started.  I told Hubby about it and he said he would check it out for me if I wanted.  Well, that night was busy, I didn’t have him check it out, and Friday morning I woke up with it feeling even worse.  I asked him to check it out that morning, and when he felt around the sore area (which was so tender!), he said he felt a hard lump where I was hurting.  My first thought was, “oh, I have some sort of cyst…no big deal, probably just needs antibiotics or something”.  Hubby’s thoughts went in a different direction…a direction that had crossed my mind, but didn’t really sink in.  I was trying to think positive, minor.  If you don’t already know this, you have lymph nodes in that area of your body.  Then it hit me.  I have two aunts that were both diagnosed with breast cancer in the past year, and another person very dear to my heart and family who has battled cancer twice now in the last 3 years, first time being breast cancer that also came with tumors in her lymph node area.  I kept trying to tell myself that this had to just be some sort of infection or something, but truth be told, I was worried.  Worried enough, either way, that I made a call to the family doctor that morning and got myself an appointment for that afternoon.  If it was just an infection, it needed treatment now.  I could hardly move my arm without pain!  IF it was something more serious, we had to find out…

Appointment time rolled around, and we all headed to the doctor.  You better believe I wanted Hubby along just in case I got bad news, just in case there would be painful tests done, I needed support.  I was so nervous and anxious the whole morning, I broke down and cried at one point, and as we were driving there, I started to feel sick to my stomach from it all.  I was thinking about the dear family friend and what she has been through.  I was thinking about all the what if’s.  I was nervous about what might happen in the doctor’s office that day (would needles be involved, would he biopsy, would he tell me things I didn’t want to hear?).  We finally get there, I fill out the paperwork I need to fill out, and we wait.  And wait.  He’s a good doctor, but there’s always a wait.  Luckily I had a toddler along to distract me a little bit during our wait.

Finally at around 1:20/1:30pm (our appointment time was actually 12:45pm), the doctor comes into the room.  I tell him what’s been going on, describe how it was feeling, and that we made the appointment right away because Hubby discovered the lump and we got worried.  I was hoping for a more immediate answer of it just being a cyst, or maybe an infected lymph node.  First thing he asks is if I have done a self breast exam in the last month, or ever for that matter.  No.  I have not.  And also not the direction I was expecting him to go right away.  That made me more worried about what it might be.  Especially after informing him that I have a family history of breast cancer, among other cancers (skin and colon).  So, after instructing me on how to perform one, he goes ahead and checks out the lump.  Ouch!  He then explains that it is definitely a lymph node.  But apparently you have clusters of them in that area, and this particular one was pretty far towards my back for him to think it was related to the frontal area.  He did know about the razor and what I thought the irritation was from.  At that point, he said that he only ever had 1 case where the lymph node was sore and it turned out to be cancerous.  Almost 100% of the time, the lumps are not sore.  So, with the knowledge of the new razor, and the location of the VERY sore lump, he diagnosed it as just what I was hoping it was – an inflamed/infected lymph node, possibly from a cut from my razor that I didn’t know I had.  He prescribed antibiotics and moist heat compresses and said I should start to feel better by Monday.  If I was not feeling better by the end of the antibiotics and the lump was still there, then I have to call back and he will order photo imaging tests. 

Well, it’s Monday.  I have been taking the meds and (almost) diligently been applying moist heat compresses 3 times a day, as instructed.  I will say that I do feel less pain today than I did on Friday, but it still is pretty sore, and I still feel that lump there.  Even though the doctor told me not to lose sleep over it this past weekend, I’m still not “out of the woods”.  I keep trying to tell myself that I have 3.5 days worth of antibiotics to take yet, so I can’t get too anxious until they’re done.  But I would be lying if I said it’s not on my mind at least twice a day…

So, I’m waiting.  Watching.  Doing what I was told.  And we’ll just have to see what it’s like on Friday when I’m done with the antibiotics.  Hopefully it will be gone, and my worrying will have been for nothing.  But for now, I wait.

 

And as a side note, I wasn’t really going to write this particular post until I was done with the medicine, knew for sure what was going on, etc.  But after reading From Mrs. to Mama’s post today for this link up, about writing what’s on your mind, getting it out of your mind and on paper (or computer in this case!), I decided this would be the perfect time to make that time for me, for this post.  If no one else reads it, I wrote it for me.

Change is coming….hopefully.

I last posted, I don’t even know when, about wanting to blog more now that Bean is a little older and I was able to put the Blogger app on my phone.  We see how well that went! 

I really do want to blog more again.  I want to be able to make something of this space again.  But, I also think I need to revamp things a little.  I started this blog before we had Bean (who will still remain nameless and be called Bean, for now).  I titled it “Steph’s Creative Life” because it was meant to share my life in general, my homemade crafts, my photography, and anything else creative I could come up with.  However, since having Bean, I don’t get out to take photos, my beads are shut away in their container in a cabinet, all the crafts are out of sight.  With extra time that I have, I focus on my new Scentsy business (that’s been almost a year now since I signed up to be a consultant!).  Yeah, never got around to telling you all about that.  If you’re interested in Scentsy, you can check out my website – https://ssgherza.scentsy.us  (Enter shameless plug…)

So, I believe some change is necessary for this blog.  And I think changing things will make me more motivated to post more often as well.  Also, making time for it at least once a week and utilizing the little “Schedule Post” button will hopefully be of help.  I’m looking to do a new background (if you actually come to the blog page and don’t just read through Reader), and even a new title!

Here’s my issue – I don’t want to change my blog name suddenly and lose any readers I may still have left (thank you if you are still reading this and have stuck around, or if you are new and checking it out for the first time!).  Other Blogger peeps – is there a way to change the name of the blog and make it automatically change in everyone’s feeds/Reader, does it do that automatically on it’s own, or will I completely break and screw up everything??

Thanks for the input and keep your eyes open for some new things!!!

It's about time...

Hello, hello!  I know I took a very long, unplanned hiatus from this blog.  Motherhood has been quite stressful and busy here.  I finally feel some motivation to want to blog again.  Thank you to those that stuck around and will continue reading as often as I am able to post.  I will do my best from now on to post more.  I have the motivation now, it's just finding the time.  I think the "schedule post" function will come in very handy for me.  I can't promise how often I will post, and I will try to catch things up on here, so just bear with me and I hope you stick around even longer now! 
And here is a recent picture of my little Bean, who is not so little anymore, but a big boy toddler now!  15 months tomorrow!

Project 365: Week 7 (I think…)

I had to double check on the week.  I got so far behind in posting before, and time is really flying (Bean will be 8 months old on Thursday!), I had to check myself on what week we were on.  Plus I am really really tired as I type this post from a not-so-great night last night.  Here are my photos from this past week:

Day 43 (part 1): Some peek-a-boo fun in bed first thing in the morning.

Day 43 (part 2): Not as cute as the first shot, but a little brighter and easier to see.

Day 44: Bean's slightly early Valentine's gift from his Great Grandmom. He absolutely loves this giant monkey - it's bigger than him! :)

Day 45: Happy Valentine's Day! Sadly, this was the extent of hubby and I's celebration this year. Just came on a busy day, and we're boring.

Day 46: Just hanging out with me on the couch, watching a little Chica the chicken puppet on Sprout TV.

Day 47: This is where he sits when I take a shower (yes, he's strapped in). It was pushing naptime as I was finishing up in the bathroom, and all of a sudden I realized he was quiet. He decided to just take his nap right then and there.

Day 48: Feeding Bean has become a ridiculous event. We have to watch Sprout TV, play with a toy, and I have to sneak the bottle in around the toy....

Day 49: Out to eat with all Bean's grandparents and his uncle. First time in a restaurant high chair! :)

 

I hope you are all having a great weekend!  If you are here from Laura’s blog, welcome and thanks for stopping by!  As you can see I don’t get to blog too much lately, but I am still looking for guest bloggers if you are interested!  I’d like to keep more content on the blog than I am able to post lately, so that my current readers and any new readers still have something to come here for!  Please message me or leave a comment if you would like to guest blog for me.  It can be about anything you want, I just as that there not be a lot of curse words or anything else offensive (also, no politics – I don’t discuss politics to begin with, and I don’t want it on my blog).  Thanks for stopping by!  Have a great week!

Project 365: Catch Up! (Weeks 2, 3, 4, 5, and 6!)

Finally back at the computer and linking up with Laura!  It’s obviously been way too long as you can see by how many weeks I am behind.  In order to shorten this post somewhat, I am going to list my captions for each week, and the photos will be on here below the captions as smaller images.  I have been keeping up with it, and posting my photos regularly on Facebook, which I can do from my phone, because yes – all my photos so far have been phone photos.  It’s handy for me, and allows me to post to Facebook as soon as I get the chance.  We have been pretty preoccupied with Bean here, some health issues that I will explain in another post.  So for now, onto the photo catch up!

Week 2:

Day 8: Bean's first taste of avocado. He made a sour face with every spoonful!

Day 9: Enough said. You get the idea. This day can never repeat itself.

Day 10: The calm before the storm. Happily playing in his around we go.

Day 11: Very sicky boy. Not usually such a cuddlebug, but he just wanted to be held and close all day.

Day 12: Still recouperating from his illness, he fell asleep all on his own while laying on the sofa next to me. That never happens. Poor baby.

Day 13: He still wasn't drinking much, but he certainly demanded his cereal and bananas!

Day 14: Bean did not want to nap when I tried to get him to take one, so I had him do tummy time instead. He quickly tired of that and took his nap. ;)

Week 3:

Day 15, part 1: Jasper just had to get under the blankets and get cozy...Day 15, part 2: ...he succeeded!

Day 16, part 1: We went out clothing shopping and Bean was trying to remove his hood...the wrong direction....    Day 16, part 2: ...he finally got the idea the hood doesn't go that way. So stinkin' cute!

Day 17: I finally got Bean's laundry folded! Thanks to his 1.5 hour nap, this basket finally got dealt with after sitting unfolded for a good 2-3 weeks! I just kept adding to it and taking out of it.

Day 18: Late night snack. I should be sleeping, but I was too busy eating these...

Day 19: Picked up this outfit for Bean for our professional family pictures session. It's a 6-9 month though, but it was on clearance for $15 (originally $35!), and I had been eyeing it for quite some time. The problem is he is still in 3-6/6 month clothes, so it might be huge on him!  *UPDATE – I was able to find it in 3-6, so I returned the 6-9, but now he is gaining weight well again, so I better schedule that session immediately!*

Day 20: New sweater for me! There was another one I liked better, but they didn't have my size. I really miss my off white soft cozy sweater I used to wear, so I needed to get a new one!

Day 21, part 1: Thunderbolts banquet was western theme this year. Bean wore his cow outfit and at the banquet we were given hats and we used the mustaches for something. Couldn't resist trying them on Bean! LOL   Day 21, part 2: Me and my cowboy...literally, he has a cow print onesie on and a cow face bib. Thunderbolts Banquet, Wild West Theme.

Week 4:

Day 22: I did not feel like cooking. We had a late night before with the banquet, and Bean not sleeping well, so I was tired and all I wanted was some comfort food delivered to my doorstep.

Day 23: Bean is 7 months old today! Time is flying...I feel like I need to start planning his 1st birthday already (because it takes me so long to do things these days...)!

Day 24: Bean's first real blood test. He didn't cry until the third (!) vial, and then I think he was just tired of being held still. The lab ladies were wonderful with him, singing songs and making him smile.

Day 25: Bean's new "rattle", LOL. He was having so much fun with this.

Day 26: I put Bean in his around-we-go while I ate dinner (it was a late dinner), and all of a sudden it got really quiet....this is what I found. This is what happens when he doesn't get a short evening nap.

Day 27: My aunt having some fun with Bean at my grandmother's house. She definitely always gets a smile and giggle out of him! (Sorry for the poor quality...it was dim, but my flash made them look horrible.)

Day 28: See that amount? 5 whole oz! Earlier? He drank 6 oz! The 5 oz is becoming a little more common than it used to be. Some feedings are still small, but hopefully we're getting somewhere now and he will catch up with weight gain!  *UPDATE – He hasn’t been drinking these amounts again lately, but like I said, I will do a Bean update post as soon as I can.*

Week 5:

Day 29: Finally had to change my Scentsy scent. Hazelnut Latte finally lost its strength, now melting Sticky Cinnamon Bun and I LOVE it!

Day 30: Bean's appointment with the GI specialist was today. We have to give him stronger medicine, switch to all formula and concentrate it a little more, hence the pump - I will no longer be needing it very soon, and I'm kind of happy about that because it will free up some time for me.

Day 31: A perfect demonstration of just how fat and lazy Jasper is....he can't even sit up/stand to drink his water!

Day 32: I don't know what was up with him tonight, but he had his tongue sticking out all night long!

Day 33: I guess officially this was taken on day 34, but it's my photo for this day. Someday I'll start getting to bed before this time...

Day 34: The in-laws came for the weekend and brought these donuts from Dunkin. Big mistake...now I want them all the time!

Day 35: With the in-laws here I was finally able to catch up on laundry. My linen closet hasn't been this full of clean towels in months!

And finally…week 6!:

Day 36: Our very own "Mr. Thomas". :)  (Watch Chronicles of Narnia if you don’t know what I mean…)

Day 37: Bath night for Bean! First time in his little ducky robe. :)

Day 38: Bean woke up from his nap in the swing, but was still tired, so he decided to continue his nap on me. He pretty much never naps on me anymore, so even though it's not ideal, the snuggles were nice. :)

Day 39: He was really pushing up on his arms this morning...now if we could just get the back half going, we'd have a mobile baby!

Day 40: He really wanted those socks! Launched himself forward from his daddy's lap!

Day 41: He was on his back when I left him on there to go put away a few dishes. This is what I came back to - somehow we keep missing him roll back to belly! Third time now!

Day 42: Bean, Daddy, and Grover hung out a lot today. I got some shopping done. (Really, Bean was making lip smacking faces at Hubby whenever he took a bite of his sandwich...I tried capturing that, but the little stinker wouldn't do it for the camera!)

So, now that I’m all caught up, sorry for the long post!  Hopefully I will be able to get on the computer a little more and participate in this more on a weekly basis instead of a monthly basis.  If you are here from the link up, thanks for stopping by!  Leave me a comment and let me know so I can be sure to check out your blog as well.  Also, thanks for looking at/reading the whole post!  Hope everyone has a happy Sunday and a great week ahead!